That's right. I don't have any awards. You are welcome to feel vastly superior to me in any way, shape, or form you see fit. And please do, as that would make me happy to know there are people out there who feel better about themselves because I am such a loser.

Now, if I were to receive any awards on my blog or any other aspect of my life that I deem important(such as the rare but highly sought after talent of being able to open innocuous packaging without being reduced to tears), here is how I would look accepting such an award:

Photo courtesy of preschool paparazzi during my daily "Kitchen Rap-Palooza".
Please note, this projection of how I would look receiving a blog award or a music video award is based on the premise that I would not be offered a stylist and a maid (a maid to clean my kitchen...I think I better just clarify that right now) along with the greatly anticipated recognition.

If I were offered a make-over with my award I would look like a cross between Nicki Minaj and this:

So, actually, I guess the first picture really would hold, regardless of whether I was given the perfunctory stylist and maid award perks.

Also, here is a picture I drew of how others look when confronted with the daunting task of opening seemingly innocuous packaging:

That's right. It doesn't seem so silly to expect an award for honing this skill, now, does it?

1 comment:

  1. tooo funny
    I don't have any awards yet, either.
    I don't think they give an award for very sporadic blogging (the only one I'd qualify for), too many contenders.


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